This is me, on a wall

Posted on February 19, 2013 | 1 comment

I was furiously bustling around my kitchen today, cleaning off counters, putting away food, and waiting for the sweet potatoes to finish cooking in the microwave when I glanced up at my wall o’ stuff.

Everyone has one, right? A bulletin board, chalk board, desk, or basket that’s teeming with symbols of your busy life.

I looked at it objectively for the first time and thought how perfectly it spells out where I am, who I am, right now.

What do you think?

busy mom's bulletin board of stuff

This is what you’ll find there, shoved haphazardly into the clips of an old Pottery Barn card holder:

—School notices for events. (Some I’ll enjoy, some I’ll tell my kids I forgot.)

—Family pictures. (Old ones that make me smile.)

—Word box calendar. (My 1st grader’s crutch for weekly sentences.)

—School lunch calendar. (For days when pizza & pancakes make life easy.)

–Restaurant coupons.  (Which I repeatedly save and never remember to use.)

–Meditation card. (Promo from local Buddhist center.  I’ll get there someday.)

–Party invitations. (A reminder of presents to buy, fun to have.)

–Martha’s Vineyard postcard. (Looking at that beach brings me back.)

–-Permission slips. (For school trips to UN and a play.)

–-Family calendar. (Filled with photos of memories past and events to come.)

–-Reading lists. (My kids will never get to all those books but we try.)

–Train schedule. (Helps me get to work (and some play) on time.)

–-Kid art. (Once it goes up, it rarely ever comes down.)

What’s on your wall of stuff?

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Beyonce’s HBO doc: Sasha Fierce shows her softer side

Posted on February 17, 2013 | 1 comment

Beyonce is the thinking woman’s celebrity. She appeals on all levels: she’s gorgeous, talented, and not in your face.

Despite their enormous fame, she and well-known husband, rap mogul Jay Z, have fiercely protected their privacy. They’ve refused to speak about their relationship publicly and -– in the age of overexposure– managed to keep their wedding and two pregnancies under the radar.

I like her music, especially its message of women empowerment. I’ve been known to vigorously shout her “who-needs-men” lyrics at top volume in the sanctity of my minivan. Plus she kicked ass at the Super Bowl, and quite possibly blew out the stadium lights with her electricity.

So I was curious about her 90-minute documentary, “Life is But a Dream,” that debuted on HBO this weekend.

Bey Bey did not disappoint.

beyonce life is but a dream review

The film—which follows her over a period of about three years—covers her making an album and performing in several huge venues all over the world. There’s some manufactured backstage drama involving support staff but it’s inconsequential. As soon as Beyonce leaves the screen, you want her back.

She’s amazing eye candy on stage. Inventive costumes, an endless parade of fabulous hairstyles, and impressive dance moves. And so much energy. She must have broken a record for most shimmy and shakes per second.

But it’s the personal stories behind the scenes that will grab you.

She keeps a video diary on her computer and often appears sans makeup, showing raw emotion about her work and life experiences. Part of the reason she wanted to do the film after avoiding discussing her personal life for so long is to let fans know she’s not just a paparazzi photo, and has the same fears, hurt, and insecurities as most people.

The film made news when Beyonce revealed she had a miscarriage before eventually having her daughter Blue Ivy in 2012. She describes hearing her baby’s heartbeat the first time she was pregnant as the most beautiful music she ever heard. When the heartbeat disappeared, she recorded what she calls the saddest song she’d ever written as a form of therapy to get through her pain.

The way she talks about the joy and fragility of her second pregnancy exposes a vulnerability that’s relatable and grounding. She convincingly debunks rumors she used a surrogate, saying she couldn’t wait to experience the excitement of giving birth. She speaks honestly throughout the doc and I found her deeply spiritual, without being preachy or self-absorbed.

beyonce hbo doc review

Watching her recording songs feels like eavesdropping on an intimate moment. Her video confessionals and the few interactions with Jay Z fascinated me. She obviously adores him. There’s one brief home video of a speech she made to him on his birthday in 2006 that’s cozy and sweet.

While she’s totally out there, Jay Z makes a few very brief appearances and maybe speaks 5 words total. I wanted to see more, but also respect that she’s still preserving boundaries.

It may sound ridiculous to make a documentary about your life and still attempt to set limits,  but Beyonce manages to do it. She shows video of her pregnant body, but only in almost animated silhouette. She finally invites the world for a look at her daughter, but only for a few moments at the end of the film. She finds a balance between sharing and keeping some things for herself.

What resonated most with me is when she talked about staying humble while honoring her fans, and staying current while being true to her soul and artistic evolution.

The film is a beacon of light in the slimy world of celebrity culture. Beyonce is a celebrity you can safely admire and a woman with an inspiring story to tell.

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How love bloomed for me and Wilson

Posted on February 14, 2013 | 10 comments

On this Valentine’s Day I thought I would  share the story of how Wilson and I fell in love.

happy valentines day blog

My parents met while studying abroad in Italy during their junior year in college. After hearing their love fairytale all my life, I went on the same program when I was in college, and secretly hoped I would find my mate.

I didn’t work out as conveniently as I imagined. I was boy-crazy throughout my semester in Florence, but never met my future husband.

Fast forward to 1993.

Wilson likes to say we met on a blind date but actually it was only visually impaired, because we had met briefly twice before.The first time we met, neither of us remember, but we were both at the rehearsal dinner and wedding of our friends, Matt and Julie in 1993. The dinner was small and we had friends in common so we must have been introduced, but neither of us can recall it.

LOVE sign Valentine's Day blog

The next time we met, it was fall of 1995.  I was living in Manhattan with my  friend, Justine.

I was on a date with a guy named Barry who really wasn’t all that. Barry and I went to a movie and ran into Julie, Matt, and Wilson. Julie pulled Wilson aside and said she wanted to set me up with him. He told her that was weird because I was on a date. “She’s not having a good time,” Julie insisted.

Three months later, Wilson called and asked me out. Back then, I was working the late shift at ABC News so I couldn’t go out until 10pm. Our first date was at a cool bar on the Upper West Side called Phoebe’s (I believe it’s gone now.)  ABC had a two-story escalator in its lobby so when Wilson met me,  I remember checking him out below, as I stood at the top of the moving steps.

He had glasses (he’s since gotten Lasik surgery) and was wearing a horrible green sweater vest, but he was still cute.

Luckily, his personality eclipsed his fashion choice and I don’t think I ever saw him wear the vest again. But the date was great and we talked for several hours and had a lot in common. He called me the next day and asked me out again, which was very exciting because– back before cell phones, texting, and social media–  sometimes a girl waited days before a guy would call and you wondered if he’d fallen into a ditch.

On our second date, he took me to a bar downtown called Chicago Blues–  a charming choice since I’m from Chicago– where we had many drinks and made out in the back room. When he took me home, he asked me out for the next evening. No games. I liked that.

But the next day a blizzard hit New York, dumping 4 feet of snow and virtually shutting down the city. I was having fun with Wilson and wanted to see him again– snow be damned. We spoke on the phone and I challenged him to walk all the way across town in a blinding storm to meet me at the movies, like we had planned. He must have already liked me because he actually did it.

We saw “Dead Man Walking,” an uplifting film with Sean Penn playing a killer on death row seeking redemption from a nun, played by Susan Sarandon. Very romantic.

After the movies we walked back to my apartment where Justine was having a bottle of wine with her then boyfriend  (now husband and dad of their 3 kids) Chris. We joined them and stayed up late talking.

Justine says she knew that night that Wilson was the one.

valentines day blog

We were pretty inseparable for the next year and got engaged in 1997 and married in 1998. This year is our 15th anniversary and I still love the big lug.

I knew when I met him that he was smart, sweet, reliable, and valued family and friends. All that’s still true but now I know he’s an amazing father and patient, forgiving, supportive partner. Believe it or not, I’m not always easy to live with!

As far as fate goes, while I never met my husband in Italy, I did meet my friend, Julie, on the first day of the trip and she eventually introduced me to Wilson.

Sometimes you just have to trust your path and hope that love will find you when you’re ready.  Happy Valentine’s Day Wilson!    xoxo

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An offbeat solution to a prevalent parenting problem

Posted on February 12, 2013 | 3 comments

I try to stick to funny or noteworthy stories about my family and stay away from parenting advice in this space. Who am I to tell you how to raise your kids?

But when I find a parenting trick that’s 100% effective, I think I owe it to you to share. Understand that what I’m about to tell you is rather unorthodox and would probably not be sanctioned by any psychologist or child-rearing expert.

But it works.

One day several years ago my boys (ages 7, 9 and 13)  were fighting over something silly. My middle son, Aden, came upstairs from the basement weeping, complaining that his brother had done him wrong. It could have been anything from taking a toy, to teasing, to excluding him from play. The sin didn’t matter, it was punishment he sought.

I tried to reason with Aden and ask all the right questions, to take blame out of the equation, instill a sense of self-reliance, and foster harmony and brotherly love.

He was having none of it. His brother was mean and he was pissed.

I’m not sure what came over me that day, but after employing all my sensible parenting methods–  likely including distraction and even bribery– I took a different tack.

“How would you like it if I just went down there and punched him in the nose?!” I said emphatically.

As soon as I said it, I felt sheepish and remorseful, knowing it was not the optimal adult response. But that all disappeared when Aden’s face lit up. He started grinning and screamed, “Yeah!!!”

And a new tool was born.

we're a nice normal family sign

I thought it was a fluke but then tried it with my other kids and the reaction was universally positive. There’s something about picturing your adversary getting punched in the nose– at the hands of your mother no less– that makes everything ok.

Of course the first time Wilson heard me say it, he gasped in horror.

“Nice, very nice. Don’t say that– you’re, you’re promoting violence!” 

He judged but I didn’t care. Still don’t.

Now mind you, I have never actually punched anyone in the nose, or anywhere else.  Most of the time I don’t even have to pretend to carry out revenge on the culprit. Just the idea of it usually suffices to get my kids over their anger.

I thought about it today when Aden came home from school and said a substitute class aide was being mean and giving the students a hard time.  I told him that wasn’t ok,  but that didn’t bring much relief. He was sinking into a mood. Then I asked if he wanted me to punch the aide in the nose, and he cracked up… and like that, it was over and he moved on.

All anyone wants is to be heard and understood. And sometimes all the right words don’t make a kid feel any better. But allowing them to imagine someone getting just desserts for bad behavior is comforting. And having me be the dragon slayer (or nose-puncher as the case may be)  in the situation makes them not only feel heard, but protected.

Like all good parenting techniques, this tactic shouldn’t be overused. I bring it out on select occasions so it has maximum impact. I’m gonna keep coasting on my empty threats until my kids tire of it….or Child Services comes to get me.

Do you have any controversial parenting tools you’d like to share? You can comment anonymously so don’t be shy!

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The best live concert on TV: Grammys 2013 wrap

Posted on February 10, 2013 | 2 comments

OK kids,  this is going to be a quickie. I enjoyed the Grammys this year and there were some memorable performances….

—Taylor Swift opened the show with an elaborate production of “We are never ever ever getting back together.” The skinny on Twitter is that she sang one of the lines in a British accent as a dig at ex Harry Styles.  (Oh No, she di-int!) Proving once again, the Grammys are a bit like the Hollywood prom.

–The King and Queen of the prom? Beyonce and JZ of course. They sat in the front row, him with a big glass of booze and her looking ga ga gorgeous in an elegant black and white jumper.

–JZ did get out of his seat to perform with Justin Timberlake, making his triumphant return to music. Not sure I love the new song but couldn’t love JT more. So cute, so talented, such swagger and style. He did a whole black and white bit that sort of worked but watching him move was the thing. The room went crazy for it.

grammys2013

–There was a memo leaked from CBS last week warning performers and presenters not to show too much skin. The usual suspects must have missed the memo. Katie Perry had an eye-opening green dress that accentuated her girls. And speaking of green, look for Florence of Florence and the Machine’s Givenchy metallic green thing. JLo looked amazing in a long black dress with a slit up the right side that looked like she was wearing only a leotard. Take that Angelina Jolie!

–My girl from “Girls” Lena Dunham was there with her boyfriend, the guitarist for fun.. who thanked her in his award speech. #Cute

–I love The Lumineers. There’s something so simple and sweet about that “Hey Ho” song that speaks to me.

–Performances worth finding online:

Taylor Swift’s opening number…. Justin Timberlake…. Kelly Clarkson singing “Natural Woman” in honor of Carole King…Rihanna singing “Could You Be Loved ” dedicated to Bob Marley and looking hot….. Sting and Bruno Mars sing Mars’ hit “Locked Out of Heaven” into The Police’s “Walking on the Moon. ”   (Side note: what is Sting eating/doing? He looks fantastic.)…Carrie Underwood  belted out two perfect numbers as a light show appeared on her ball gown….A Tribute to The Band’s Levon Helm had  a jammin version of “The Weight” featuring the Zac Brown Band, Elton John, and many others.

Other than JLo and Florence’s showstoppers, I didn’t see any dresses that wowed– although Carrie Underwood looked beautiful in a sparkly gown when she won. You can see all the fashion pix here.  Misses: Miranda Lambert: beautiful girl, beautiful voice, bad dress…. Someone named Kimbra who sang with Gotye wore some see-through, studded, mermaid mish-mash disaster…. Love Adele but her dress looked like a carpet-bag or Grandma’s drapes. Sorry love.

That’s my brief rookie wrap. Unlike some past years, I actually knew most of the performers and nominees. Not sure if that’s because my kids make me constantly listen to HITS-1 or if maybe music isn’t skewing so young this year. I like it when music shows don’t make me feel ancient.

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A word about blogging and some of my fav bloggers

Posted on February 5, 2013 | 1 comment

JakeKeepingScore kids sports blog

I’m coming up on the first anniversary of carpoolcandy.com. It’s an intense commitment but rewarding in so many ways. You can’t improve as a writer unless you write consistently and this forum allows me to do that, while hopefully entertaining you at the same time. I try to blog three times a week and that routine provides a mental challenge to come up with ideas, while keeping my writing muscles active.

But a large part of being a blogger is promoting your posts and finding new ways to get more readers. That part is not my forte.

I know there are a million sites I should be looking at and contributing to, but I can’t seem to find the time. I’m working and running a family so just getting the blog out feels like a triumph most days. The thought of selling myself is not motivating. But I know that’s part of the game and I want to be a player.

Blogging is a solitary vocation. Sharing your personal stories and opinions is a risky and often terrifying experience. That’s why when I meet a fellow blogger, I’m instantly intrigued and enamored. Only other bloggers know the fear of staring at a blank screen. Or the aggravation of technical problems that zapped one of the best paragraphs you’ve ever written. Or the gut punching nag in the middle of the night you feel when you posted something negative about another person’s work.

There are plenty of crazies out there who blog for attention and shock value. There are more whose prose makes me squirm and wonder how they can proudly hit the publish button.

But then there are those who make me laugh, cry, and envy their talent. I’m celebrating some of my favorite fellow bloggers today. I may not be good at touting my blog but I love to promote others. Some are friends, but most I met through writing. It’s hard to keep up with so many blogs  so while I don’t read them all religiously, I am spiritually connected to each one.

Check them out when you have a moment or save this post in your email to look at later. You won’t be disappointed.

Gossip/celebrities/pop culture:   http://dishuponastar.blogspot.com/  This celebrity-obsessed writer cracks me up with her shameless commentary on all things Hollywood, with a New York point of view.

chewnibblenosh food blog

Food:    http://chewnibblenosh.com/ This blog will make you want to flee to the market and spend a day in the kitchen, even if you hate to cook. I love her voice, most of her recipes are simple and family-friendly, and her photos are gorgeous.

Design:     http://jlatter.com/category/news/  This LA-based interior designer has great taste and style, and a curiosity about how things are made. She’s into the texture and artistry of objects– both old and new– and turning your passion into personal style in the home.

Parenting:    http://www.ratedpthemusical.com/blog.php This actress and mom of two wrote a brilliant musical about parenting called “Rated P for Parenthood.”  Now she blogs about those mom moments when you want to stop and soak it all in….or soak your kids with a rubber hose.

peachesandcocnuts humor blog

Humor:     http://www.peachesandcoconuts.com/ From this hilarious writer’s “about” page: A lady-loving lady who has finally come to terms with her inner Jewish mother. I blog for you because there is no “i” in u-terus. Need I say more?

Sports:    http://jakekeepingscore.wordpress.com/  I can’t write about favorite bloggers and not include my son, Jacob’s, sports blog. He only writes once a week and I rarely understand everything he says, but for a 13-year-old he’s  a terrific storyteller with a unique point of view. Sports fans love it.

These are only a few of the many blogs I read, and I’ll feature more from time to time. Let me know what you think. I’d also love to know which of my posts you click on more– family life or pop culture– or does it just depend on the topic? Any insight into what readers like is greatly appreciated.

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My son is so over me

Posted on February 3, 2013 | 4 comments

So it happened.

It was one of those moments you hear about from parents of older children, but you hope won’t happen to you. My oldest son, Jacob, was embarrassed to be seen with me.

It makes sense of course, and is totally age appropriate. He actually turns 13 tomorrow. But still I felt shock and dismay when he told me in no uncertain terms not to pick him up from a family friend’s bat mitzvah party this weekend.

He’s been a playa with the ladies since he was 5– practicing the art of flirting with his kindergarten teacher and mastering it in recent years with a regular gaggle of preteen girls. I get why he doesn’t want me weakening his game.

But he and I have a special relationship. He’s a talker– like his mom– so he frequently confides in me about friends, school, and girls, and seems to value my opinion. I have a nice bond with his gang of boys and they’re always eager to chat when I see them, so I can’t be a complete loser among his peers.

Jacob and me bonding

He had a basketball game and had to leave the party early so I was going to bring him his uniform and pop in for 5 minutes to say mazel tov to the event hosts. But Jacob was having none of it. Our text conversation went something like this:

Cool mom:   I’m going to bring your stuff at 240p. 

Mortified son:  NO! I have nowhere to put it. and you’re not invited. You’re not coming. Seriously, that’s so annoying.

Cool mom:  I’m coming for 5 minutes.

Mortified son: Well, I’ll be gone. Bring it to the game. Don’t come. What is your problem? I don’t want you here. 

Cool mom:  I’ll be there at 2p and I’ll only stay for an hour. I’m wearing a bikini and carrying sparklers and balloons. See you soon!!!

Mortified son:  Be quiet don’t come!

Cool mom:  Go have fun at the party. 

Mortified son:  Meet me at the game.

Cool mom:  Love you too!!

When I got there, he was leaving and barely acknowledged me as I handed him his bag.

It’s funny. But it’s also a moment that changes everything. His face no longer lights up when I walk in a room. He doesn’t want to share his world with me the way he once did. He’s growing up.

Next weekend our whole family was invited to another bar mitzvah and Jacob is pissed. He actually demanded we decline the invitation so he can hang with his friends without us invading his space.

teen embarrassed by parents
Jacob & his bros enjoying a party

I told him– in the kindest of ways– that we were actually looking forward to cocktails and dancing with our friends and didn’t plan to cramp his style. We had to promise we won’t approach or speak to him when he’s with his friends.

The bargaining over our family’s “appropriate behavior” in front of his friends got so eye-rollingly ridiculous that we started torturing him for sport. Every day for a week, Wilson would yell “Hey Jacob, how do you like my moves?” and then dance like a freak, to the howls and giggles of his brothers….and then “Bet you can’t wait to see me on the dance floor at the party!” 

Jacob is not happy.

His only saving grace to the whole family being invited to this party is that his 7-year-old brother, Eli, is the greatest wing man ever. There’ll be girls all over him.

Eli getting girls at family party
Eli getting girls at family party

But Jacob still wishes we’d just stay home.

I get it. I was 13 once too. So I’ll try my hardest not to embarrass him next weekend and only peek in his direction when I know he’s not looking.

And hope that he still tells me all about it when we get home.

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Idol chatter: Season 12 begins

Posted on January 31, 2013 | 1 comment

That’s right, I’m still watching Idol. I’ve been a fan since the beginning and I’m sticking with it– at least as long as Ryan’s still hosting.

I know some of you have grown weary of the frequently changing faces at the judge’s table– but I say variety is the spice of life. You fair-weather fans say it’s boring and played out. By definition, reality TV can’t be routine. Each season brings new personalities, challenges, and talent.  Some say it’s old news and have moved on to copycats like “The Voice,” and “X-Factor.” I’ve tried those other shows. I just can’t stick with them.

American Idol season 12 graphic

Idol is a classic– the gold standard of music reality shows– still making dreams come true. It’s like an old cashmere sweater hiding at the back of my closet. Every January when it’s cold and dark, it’s there waiting for me. You know what? It’s cozy and comfortable, and still fits.

Even if you’ve given up,  you know you’re still curious. That’s what I’m good for, kids. Here’s the lowdown….

Auditions:  Auditions are my least favorite part of the season but they’ve figured out how to pick up the pace and make them worth watching. The producers seem to be highlighting more girls than boys this year. One new thing: nominations. Randy Jackson walked into a high school student’s class to ask her to audition on the recommendation of her aunt, who said her niece was too shy to try out. An entertaining twist–although it sucked the drama out of her audition. If producers vetted  the girl, she was presumably  ready for Hollywood. But I like that they’re trying new things and adding to the personal stories– which is the best part of the show.

And even after 11 years, they still know how to tell a sappy story that makes me cry. The girl who lost 40% of her hearing and croons like a champ, the boy who has a severe stuttering problem except when he sings, and the guy whose grandfather died right before his inspired audition all turned me to mush.

American Idol season 12 judges

Judges scoop:

Mariah Carey– Let’s be honest. Anything is gonna be a letdown after JLo. Mariah just can’t compete with JLo’s clothes, skin, hair… and her easy, supportive way with the contestants. So far, Mariah seems sedated. She’s sweet with the kids and seems genuinely moved at times but there’s no oomph. At all.  I’ve yet to see one diva outfit or moment, but I haven’t seen much personality either– even when bickering with Nicki. I’m still waiting Mariah…

Nicki Minaj- On the other end of the spectrum is Ms. Nicki the rapper. She shows up with cotton candy hair, Cher wigs, crazy makeup and costumes and gives every contestant a goofy nickname, just for kicks. Her talent comments are  limited but her personal comments are kooky and seem aimed only at grabbing attention. She can be argumentative for no reason and has stormed off set at least once in a huff about nothing. Is the whole act fabricated for buzz and ratings? I’m not sure, but I’m not buying it.

Keith Urban- The Aussie country star is the most intelligent judge and takes his job seriously. He knows music and has the most useful constructive criticism and praise to offer contestants, although he talks about tone a bit too much. He doesn’t seem to buy into the cat fighting that goes on between Mariah and Nicki, but he’s too nice to tell them to shut up. I like it when he casually mentions wife Nicole Kidman and often wonder if he knows the extent of Tom Cruise’s craziness.

Randy Jackson- This old dawg has gotten mean. He has taken over the Simon role of breaking hearts and dashing dreams but he lacks Simon’s dastardly charm.  He’s the senior senator here and a producer who’s worked with Mariah, so he should be refereeing the spats and taking control, instead of mailing it in.

The Contenders:  Last year I saw Philip Phillips sing his own funky acoustic version of  “Billy Jean” and I knew he was going to win. So far, I  haven’t seen any contestants that knocked me out like that.  Some of the raw talent is amazing– as in recent  years– and there are several singers who have the “whole package” and will go far in the competition.  Two standouts include Ashlee Feliciano– who is beautiful, sweet and has great tone…plus the bonus of coming from a family that adopts special needs kids.  I also liked Sarah Restuccio, who is very pretty and poised, and can belt. There is also a guy from New Orleans whose family lost everything in Katrina who has a powerful voice. But everything can change in Hollywood.

Ryan Seacrest rocks: Not only did he make a gazillion dollars in his last Idol contract, but clearly Ryan has thrown his weight around because he is front and center in every promo and poster and his face looms all over the Idol  website. But I say he’s worth it. He’s cool, but not too cool. He’s sweet and homey with family and friends of contestants, but not annoying. He asks good questions and knows music and TV. He’s a media mogul who acts like a regular guy. He’s the heart of the show for me.

That’s it for now. I’ll check in again when we get to the top 24.  Did I sway you to watch?

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May I Be Happy: Book for yogis and women who struggle with body image

Posted on January 27, 2013 | Comments Off on May I Be Happy: Book for yogis and women who struggle with body image

I reviewed a book this month by yoga guru Cyndi Lee called “May I Be Happy: A Memoir of Love, Yoga, and Changing my Mind.”  It’s about a world-famous yoga teacher– and founder of the OM yoga studio in New York– who despite her ability to stand on her head and other feats of will and strength, always hated how she looked.

may i be happy cyndi lee yoga book review

I get to choose the books I review and this one appealed to me because I love yoga, and– like millions of women–  have never been happy with my body.  It’s an interesting read, especially for anyone who has sat on a yoga mat and marveled at a teacher’s ability to do some impossible pose, or chant Sanskrit without any fear or insecurity.

I revere many of my yoga teachers and am often motivated by their strong, lean bodies. So it’s fascinating to read the intimate details of a teacher’s mental struggle to accept herself.

Like, Lee, I began feeling insecure about my body soon after puberty when it changed in ways that made me feel uncomfortable and vulnerable. Although never grossly overweight, I have never felt satisfied with the way I look and believed if I could only be disciplined and lose 10 pounds, then I’d be happy.

But as Lee finds out, it doesn’t always work that way. There are reasons we struggle with self-acceptance that usually have nothing to do with a number on a scale. We beat ourselves up and let that ugly voice in our heads dictate our moods.

Lee– who’s now in her 50’s– had allowed those voices to shame her for decades. The book chronicles her journey to discover the root of her body issues and the tools to get over them. She interviews many experts and tries everything from meditation to positive affirmations to find the happiness she seeks.

Yoga guru and author Cyndi Lee

Yoga guru and author Cyndi Lee

The writing is not strong, but the message is, so if the subject appeals to you, it’s worth a read.  You can read my full review in the New York Times here.

I know women struggle with body image because it’s a constant topic of conversation among my friends.  Let me know in the comments your thoughts on self acceptance and whether you’d read this book. Namaste!

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