Tag Archives: best family life blog

You can’t put a price on self-esteem

NCJW Back @ School Store NJ/Carpoolcandy.com

This morning I volunteered at an annual event to help economically disadvantaged kids get new clothes and school supplies.

The Back 2 School Store is run by the Essex County Section of the National Council of Jewish Women— a formidable bunch of dames who make life better for women and children in Northern New Jersey.

I helped three adorable 5-year-olds–  Shirley, Imani, and Izquiel– stuff their bags with a snazzy new outfits plus coats, hats and gloves, and a backpack teeming with personal care products, notebooks, markers and everything they’ll need for kindergarten in the fall.

NCJW Back 2 School Store NJ/ carpoolcandy.com

I set aside this August Sunday every year because I know how great it feels to watch the kids embrace their experience. As the mom of three boys, it’s also a thrill to share my enthusiasm for shopping with an exuberant girl.

Another useful aspect of the event is the family resource center set up for the caregivers. Representatives from at least 20 agencies provide services and information on important wellness and social issues to people who might not otherwise have access. There were medical professionals doing glucose and eye tests, and leaflets on nutrition, lead poisoning and choking.

NCJW Back 2 School Store NJ/ carpoolcandy.com

All reminders of how lucky I am to be able to take my kids to get new clothes, shoes, and school supplies…and regular medical checkups when they need them.

NCJW Back 2 School Store NJ/ carpoolcandy.com

I’ve volunteered for this program since it launched 5 years ago so I know that when I first meet the kids to help them shop, they’re anxious and fearful. Who wants to leave your parent and walk around with a strange grown-up in an unfamiliar place?

But, without exception, every time they leave the store, they’re beaming.

Look at these faces!

NCJW Back 2 School Store NJ/ carpoolcandy.com

NCJW Back @ School Store NJ/Carpoolcandy.com

NCJW Back 2 School Store NJ/carpoolcandy.com

They love their new stuff and the opportunity to choose everything themselves, as caregivers are not permitted in the store. The girls often pick every single pink item available– and the boys put outfits together with no regard for matching whatsoever.  The shoppers are trained to facilitate shopping, and keep our big mouths shut so the kids have complete autonomy.

NCJW Back @ School Store NJ/Carpoolcandy.com

But it’s so not about the clothes.

The excitement of a shopping spree and the self-esteem they feel when they walk out is priceless.

If you want more info on all the great work NCJW does, check out their website at http://www.ncjwessex.org/

There’s more to BlogHer13 than free lube

BlogHer13 carpoolcandy.com

Last weekend I was in Chicago for the Super Bowl of blogging conventions: BlogHer.  This was my second year at the conference– last year it was in New York — and it was comforting to be surrounded by so many women who also stare at a computer screen for hours on end, trying to tell meaningful stories.

When I took out my favorite notebook — a spiral large enough to hold my pen, with blank pages and Andy Warhol-esque neon prints of the Mona Lisa on the cover–   I noticed  many others with unique journals filled with scribbled ideas and lists and thought, “These are my people.”

My highlights:

Pioneer Woman Ree Drummond at BlogHer13 on carpoolcandy.com

Inspirational speakers— The conference opened with a chat with Ree Drummond, better known as The Pioneer Woman.” Her talk was as funny, authentic, and heart-felt as her blog, punctuated by some of her famous photos. She moved from city life to a ranch in the middle of nowhere after falling hard for her husband. They make their home on the range with 4 kids and a menagerie of barnyard animals. Her blog has become so popular, she’s written several cookbooks and children’s books, and hosts a show on the Food Network, but  blogging is still her favorite endeavor. I wasn’t the only one inspired when she pointed out that she was sitting at a table at BlogHer just six years ago wondering what she was doing with her life.  And look at her now!

Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg at BlogHer13 on carpoolcandy.com

Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg at BlogHer13

Facebook CEO Sheryl Sandberg grabbed me with her message of empowerment. I was skeptical after all the press about her bestseller, “Lean In,” fearing it would make me feel like a failure because I left my TV career to spend more time with my kids. But I received the opposite message from her in person. She talked about how potent fear can be when it comes to women and success. Why are we so afraid of speaking up, taking risks, failing, succeeding? She also got extra points when asked what she does to de-stress, because her answer was watching well-written TV, like “Girls.” I liked her so much I’m going to read the book and will report back.

Queen Latifa was the emcee of Voice of the Year at BlogHer13

Queen Latifa was the emcee of Voices of the Year

Voices of the Year– Each year, bloggers submit posts and BlogHer chooses the best 100 of the year and 12 get to read their winning pieces at the conference.   The writing was poignant and represents a wide breadth of life experience. One called DIY is full of danger...” –about a mom who accidentally gave herself a raging case of hives while crafting– made me howl laughing.  There were also incredible posts on topics as varied as surviving cancer, being a gay Christian missionary, and parenting a child with suicidal depression.  The writers drew us in with their honesty, strength, and courage.

Transformer at swag expo /BlogHer13 on carpoolcandy.com

Swag expo at BlogHer13 on carpoolcandy.com

Jamba Juice at swag expo at BlogHer13 on carpoolcandy.com

House of swag-–  What’s a convention without marketing and bags of useless swag? There was a football-field sized expo with booths looking to lure in bloggers with free stuff so they’ll promote their brands. With more than 4,000 women expected, marketers tried to create a lady’s paradise.

aerobics at BlogHer13/ carpoolcandy.com

manicures at BlogHer13/ carpoolcandy.com

You could try a new cell phone, take an aerobics class, get your hair and nails done, or try a bevy of beauty products. Munchies I tried included cake, candy, and yogurt, washed down with champagne.

Last year the smarties at Trojan handed out vibrators, sparking thousands of blog mentions (including mine,)  so this year…lubricant.

Trojan lubricant at swag expo at BlogHer13 on carpoolcandy.com

Who doesn’t want a picture standing next to a giant bottle of lube to blog about? Good times.

I learned stuff– Like any conference, there were some helpful speakers and sessions, and some duds. I marked up my paper schedule, and referred to the BlogHer13 iPad app like I was at freshman orientation. I don’t care if I was a blog nerd, I sacrificed a workday and a weekend, paid money, and flew to Chicago so I was going to squeeze all the valuable info possible out of my two days.  The talks on optimizing social media and getting writing published were extremely useful, and an identity discussion on how to measure success if you choose not to become a brand and seek out advertisers resonated with me.

BlogHer13 on carpoolcandy.com

Meeting bloggers– I attended several sessions to help improve my writing, marketing and social media skills and was impressed by the success of many bloggers. I know how much time mine requires, yet there are myriad ways I could become more entrenched in the blogging community, and use Facebook and Pinterest to increase my numbers. These ladies plopped down their laptops, smart phones, and iPads, ready to get down to business, asking pointed questions while blogging, Tweeting, and taking notes simultaneously.

I met two savvy bloggers at one session who were beginners like me. I hope we’ll stay in touch and one day be chatting behind a podium as presenters on the “How My Blog Became a Book” panel, looking back on BlogHer13 and laughing at what rookies we were. Shout out to Amy at  AMyNameisAmy and Emily at Em-i-lis — let’s make it happen ladies!

Chicago skyline on carpoolcandy.com

Chicago–It’s my hometown so part of my motivation was to stay with friends (thanks Sash!)  Sunny skies and 75 degree days, and watching bikers and runners on the lake always elevates my mood. Everyone looks like they’re having fun during summertime in Chicago. The food ain’t bad either.

Me time– It’s rare to have that much time to myself. I was able to catch up with friends, uninterrupted by persistent kid questions, carpools, and needs.  It was important to clear my mind a bit to absorb everything I learned and experienced at the conference.  The time away put me in a reflective mood and made me think about why I blog and what’s next.

There are no easy answers, but BlogHer13 sure got me thinking.

Puppy love!

Big news! (drumroll please)….. our puppy arrives September 7th!

For those of you following along, we’ve been debating whether to get a dog for a couple of years and finally decided to make it happen. It might have been the day I looked out the window and found 10-year-old Aden playing in the back yard with a cicada. (No joke!)

The poor kid really needs a pooch.

I started to do some research but I believe fate is what brought this puppy to us. I ran into a friend at a concert two weeks ago.  She has a beautiful 16-month old Golden Doodle named Dempsey who we met as a puppy who was very sweet and good with kids and other dogs.  She told me her breeder had just had a litter that week and had more puppies than expected.

Dempsey

Dempsey

Aden and I looked up the breeder on the web and liked the way they talked about the dogs– professional and affectionate, but not over the top. The site answered all my questions and had adorable pictures of their dogs and puppies.

The father of the puppies is an English Cream Golden Retriever and the mother is a Moyen Poodle named Zoey– the same name as our cousins’ dog whom we love. This English Cream breed of Golden Doodles have very light-colored, wavy hair that hopefully won’t shed too much, which is good for 7-year-old Eli’s asthma and allergies.

Every time I stopped someone on the street to ask what breed their cute dog was, 8 times out of 10 it was a Golden Doodle. Everything I read confirmed that they are social, great with kids, have a good disposition, and smart, so easy to train.  It seemed like a good fit for us.

We were sold.

Next we had to decide whether we wanted a male or female. I was leaning towards female to even out the gender in our family a bit. I read that females were more mellow in the puppy phase and more independent as adult dogs. Males can be more difficult to calm but loyal and affectionate.

We chose female because there were less girls in the litter, but I’m still on the fence. Our breeder says personality is much more important than gender so we’re checking the website regularly, where she posts information on each puppy. She gives them each different colored collars and takes notes on their behavior to get a sense of their personalities.

These are the puppies at about three weeks old. Still haven’t all opened their eyes yet!

new puppies!

I’ve bought a bunch of books and have been quizzing friends so I’m as prepared as possible for this big change in our lives. When I told a friend who just got a puppy a month ago that we put a deposit down and are expecting ours shortly she said “you may regret it on a  minute to minute level, but never a day by day level.”

I told her there will be no regrets, only puppy love from here on out.  How can you not love something that cute? Even if he is chewing my favorite shoes  and peeing on my rug. He/she will be a part of our family and you don’t mess with family.

I’m eager to hear your thoughts on boy or girl– as we may still have a choice– and also possible names. I welcome all advice as long as it’s positive. There’s no turning back now.

Carpool Candy secrets revealed

After blogging for more than a year, getting people to read it is always more challenging than writing.  Some of you are extremely loyal readers whom I adore, others are passersby who stumble onto Carpool Candy from a Google search and stay to poke around.

But I’ve realized that people don’t always understand how the blog works.

carpool candy logo

I used to write a regular weekly column for an AOL/Patch website that was also called Carpool Candy, but I stopped writing that almost three years ago. I wanted to keep writing and sharing my stories so Carpool Candy the blog was born, hosted by WordPress.

One way to gauge a blog’s popularity is by how many followers it has. If you like Carpool Candy and hate to miss a post, you should become a follower. Look on the upper right corner of your screen and there should be a box that either says “you follow this blog” or asks you to sign up to follow it. All that means is you provide your email address and choose whether you want to receive an email every time I post (2-3 times a week) or once a week.

WordPress provides a stats page, which is a fascinating window into who’s reading my blog. I admit, I’m obsessed with my stats. I check them 3-4 times a day. I like to see what time of day people read posts most (usually morning,) and where they come from ( I get readers from all over the world, from Singapore to Ireland to Dubai, but 80% come from the US and Canada.)

I can also tell who found me on Facebook and Twitter, and who did a Google search. I have a list of detailed search terms that helps me see which posts are hitting best and which have longevity.  A post I wrote in March of 2012 about my son’s scavenger hunt birthday party is very popular and gets multiple hits every single day. My most popular post of all-time was the recent one I wrote about yoga, which got close to a thousand views in one day!

blog logo

The craziest story about my stats is when I wrote a post last summer about our family trip to Martha’s Vineyard. I mentioned a beach we went to that has a clothing-optional section. You’ll notice I’m not using certain words here because for several weeks after that post I was getting many hits a day from people searching the web for “(other words for) clothing optional and kids.” Creepy!

Thus far, I’ve made no effort to sell ads on my site. That’s partly because I thought I needed to bank content, and get a significant following before I went out and sold my product. But it’s also because the idea of marketing my work scares the snot out of me. My goal was never to make big money off the blog, but rather to write meaningful pieces that kept my writing muscle active, and could either help me get a paid entertainment/lifestyle writing job, or maybe a book deal.

A girl can dream, no?

My number of blog visitors and how many posts they viewed have increased significantly most months  (August/ December were my slowest)  but I wish they were higher.

When I see people I know, they frequently apologize for not being up-to-date on my blog.  That’s crazy!  I don’t expect anyone (except you, Mom!) to read every post. I have many blogging friends whose writing I love and I wish I had the time to read every word of every post, but it’s not realistic.

One of my fav bloggers at BlogHer12

One of my fav bloggers at BlogHer12

It’s more helpful for you to spread the word if you like a post, than read each one. My goal is to provide great content and find new readers and you can actually help with that. Here’s how:

Become a follower! Sign up for regular emails. It’s free!

“Like” my new Carpool Candy Facebook page, which you’ll find right here.

SHARE! SHARE! SHARE!   Please share any posts you like on your Facebook page or forward a link to a friend. That’s huge.

Tell me how you find the blog most often. Facebook? Email? Friend?

Tell me in the comments (or Tweet me @carpoolcandy)  which topics you click on most. Sappy kid stories? TV analysis? Social media stories? Party ideas? Books? I’m always surprised by which stories get play and which fizzle. Tell me why!

I’m attending a giant blogging conference this week in Chicago called BlogHer, where I hope to get more ideas for making CarpoolCandy even better and reaching more people.  5,000 opinionated women (and a few brave men!)  in one space should be informative… and loud.  Will report back next week.

Thanks for being the people who read CarpoolCandy!