Tag Archives: sports-obsessed boys

Three boys and a lady: how I mother males

Today I spent the afternoon at the Giants game with Wilson and my sons (ages 8, 10, and 13,) and as I was feigning interest in something called a Pick 6 play, I had a big-picture moment about being a mom of three boys.

Young Giants fans at the game on carpoolcandy.com

I often find myself in situations I could have never expected. Like this weekend, when I froze my ass off in the bleachers for 4 hours as I watched my middle son play 2 fall baseball play off games. Or when I came dangerously close to sitting on the toilet in my bathroom, only to realize it was unflushed and the seat sprinkled with pee droplets. Or when I had to redirect the dinner conversation from fantasy football stats to anything non-sports related.

I’m the blond-haired black sheep in my family. I’m a girl.

There are benefits to being the only chick in the house. There isn’t a ton of drama, and my boys don’t hold a grudge. None of them really care how I look and so far, they don’t judge me.

Mom and sons on carpoolcandy.com

Before I had kids, I thought my perfect family would be two boys and a girl. I pictured my daughter and I having the close relationship I share with my mother. We would get manicures, go shopping and whisper secrets. She would borrow my clothes and I’d tell her and her friends about all the stupid adolescent mistakes I made, while we ate cookies we baked together.

But that wasn’t to be.

When I had Eli– my third healthy baby boy– any smidge of disappointment about his gender was quickly replaced by gratitude and relief.

While I was a pretty clueless teenager, I bloomed into a capable, confident mother. I knew how to parent boys and I was on a roll. Throwing a girl in there may have disrupted my swerve. Plus, the chances of me screwing her up were extremely high.

I believe you get what you’re supposed to get.

So I find my moments with my boys. I may not love the 24/7 sports engagement…their dirty, smelly, slovenly ways…or their complete disregard for my feelings most of the time. But I’ve found common ground with each of them.

13-year-old Jacob is a huge gossip. His uncanny ability to listen to two conversations at once and remember details about people and events serves us both well. He loves to hear any story I tell — old or new, about strangers or friends. We’re both fascinated by people and why they do the crazy things they do.

Aden, 10, is my sensitive, deep thinker. The other day we curled up on the couch and watched a movie (it was “The Way, Way Back,” a coming of age story which I highly recommend) and when the bittersweet ending came, both of us sobbed. He snuggled with me under a blanket and we watched the entire roll of credits, tears splashing down our faces.

boy wearing nail polish on carpoolcandy.com

Eli is my style maven. He cares about his clothes and understands the difference between clashing and matching. He’s my go-to when I need an opinion on which outfit is more flattering or cool.  When I wear something new, he actually notices, and is the first to compliment me on a haircut or new pair of shoes. He also loves accompanying me to the nail salon and even enjoys a manicure now and then. This week he chose blue for the Giants.

I love being the mom of three boys.

You get what you’re supposed to get, and then you find what you need.

Fasten Your Laces for Kids Spring Sports Season

KIds Spring Sports Begin: Aden (left) on soccer field

My sons’ eager and dedicated coaches just sent out the spring practice/ game schedules and I’m feeling stressed.

Wilson and my three boys (ages 6, 8, and 12) are consumed with sports.  If they aren’t watching games or highlights, they are discussing teams, stats, strategies, trades, plays, and records.  But they’re in all their glory when actually playing sports– which they do, a lot.

Their sports calendar is my version of March Madness, only it extends through June. There are carpools, equipment checks, and enough Gatorade to fill an Olympic-sized pool.  Since Wilson doesn’t get home until after 7:30pm, much of the time management and driving to these athletic commitments falls on me.

Jacob taking a swing

We just came off winter– our slowest sports season—with only basketball and some indoor soccer. It was nice to have some free weekends to make plans or do a house project. But now we’re heading into primetime sports insanity.  6-year-old Eli will have two Little League T-ball practices and one afternoon of basketball, but my two older jocks are both on baseball and travel soccer teams.  That translates to a combined total of 8 practices and a minimum of 5 games a week.

Did I mention that I am not a sports fan? Yeah, I really don’t give a hoot who won the Rangers game last night, for whom Manning will play next season, or that Lehigh upset Duke in the first round of the NCAA tournament. It’s actually kind of crazy that I even know these facts at all, except that I live with 3 little sports tickers who constantly spew factoids, so I learn by athletic osmosis.

I find myself feigning interest just to have the pleasure of conversing with them. Those of you who have boys—or a husband for that matter—know that they aren’t prone to excessive talking or sharing. So when they want to tell me every detail of their college basketball bracket, I try to hide the dullness behind my eyes and focus on how cute they look exuding pastime passion.

I admit I’ve become more of a fan since living in my own ESPN Zone. I root for the Mets, Knicks, and Giants and now understand the intricacies of stealing bases or boxing out after a rebound.  But it’s really watching my boys play that has converted me.

Eli dribbling down the soccer field

Most days, they happily skip to the car for practice and suit up early for games. They do drills outside to work on a skill they haven’t yet mastered.  Eavesdropping on Eli doing the play-by-play of an imaginary game for an hour in the back yard makes my heart melt.

They love sports and I love them for it.  I have experienced deep pride in their wins, and learned life lessons from their losses. Playing sports has taught them commitment, bravery and integrity, and witnessing that has been an inspiring experience.

I may never watch (or understand) an entire football game, but I will always want to sit in the room while my boys argue every play.  You can find me in the bleachers ready to cheer on my MVP, or console my benchwarmer.  Win or lose, I’ll eternally enjoy how they play the game.

The boys in their jerseys at the Knicks game