Category Archives: Working Mom Adventures

“How to Look Hot in a Minivan” Review: Celebrity Style Tips from the Inside

I reviewed a book this week that’s great for moms who need a style lift. And who doesn’t really?! If you need advice on anything from buying jeans to eye cream check out “How To Look Hot in a Minivan.”

When I first received the book, with the subtitle “A Real Woman’s Guide to Losing Weight, Looking Great, and Dressing Chic in the Age of the Celebrity Mom”– I rolled my eyes and expected shallow nonsense.

I was wrong!

Author Janice Min is the executive editor of the “The Hollywood Reporter” and previously edited “US Weekly” so she knows her celebrity stuff. She divulges the inside info, from the perspective of a less than perfect real mom of three. She’s a great writer and includes many personal stories of her own pregnancy and parenthood experiences that are extremely relatable– from the time someone asked when she was due weeks after the baby was born… to the guilt of working motherhood.

The book gets into specifics on clothing and beauty products with scoop from celebrity stylists that is actually very helpful. Did you know you can zap a zit with Visine or use dry shampoo to save a bad hair day?  Min also dishes about Gwyneth’s best hair accessory, Sarah Jessica Parker’s favorite cleanse, and Kelly Ripa’s workout DVD of choice.

She also gets into detail on exercise programs, and nutrition with useful lists of healthy snacks and bad food traps– especially when feeding kids. She includes a whole chapter on plastic surgery that was fascinating and abhorrent all at the same time.

The book offers valuable advice in a funny, easy way with a message of being good to yourself. It would make a great gift for new moms as it’s filled with stories that most people won’t tell you when you’re pregnant (stretch marks, hair loss, cellulite!) Somehow Min breaks it to them gently, with lots of pretty celebrity photos.

Please click here to read my review and let me know in the comments if you would read it or buy it for a friend. My copy is dog-eared already.

Top 7 Observations from BlogHer12

Last week I attended my first blogging conference: BlogHer12.  What happens when you bring nearly 5,000 mouthy broads together to talk about what they do? You get a very loud room, for starters.

Martha Stewart and BlogHer co-founder Elisa Camahort at BlogHer12

BlogHer.com is a media company created by three savvy women, to help bring together and showcase female bloggers. It’s the largest community of women who blog, boasting 40 million unique visitors per month. The BlogHer.com site is a guide to the latest news and trends for women in social media and a publishing network of more than 3,000 blogs.

Each year it’s in a different city, but this year the 9th annual BlogHer conference was in Manhattan so it was a perfect opportunity to check it out without a huge commitment.

I loved everything about it.

I met interesting, smart, like-minded people who were eager to talk about many of my interests. I attended lectures where I got practical, business, and technical tips on how to improve my blog and get more people to read it. And I got a free vibrator!

Trojan really grabbed our attention!

While many bloggers were old-timers and knew how to work the conference, I was a rookie and wanted to experience as much as I could so I was moving nonstop, taking it all in, and making mental notes to share. I roped my blogger friend, Sandy (read her peachy parenting blog here)  into going with me and she was an amusing ally in this most excellent adventure.  Read on for details……

— Bloggers don’t shut up!  From the Newbie breakfast to the keynote speaker at lunch, to the crowded exhibition halls, it was sometimes difficult to hear because there were so many ladies chat-chat-chatting. One the plus side, everyone I met was  friendly and outgoing and I had no problem striking up conversation with strangers all day long.

The Expo Hall (of wonders)

Bloggers are swag hags!  I was amazed at the elaborate setups companies had– carpeting, leather couches, music– and some set up entire stores inside the expo. Reusable bags were the most popular giveaway– I got at least 6– but they were doling out everything from water bottles to fake nails to stationary. You could eat and drink for free too– I had delicious cupcakes, cookies, and pretzels, and washed it down with a margarita.  Other businesses offered manicures, massages, and beauty consulting. When Martha Stewart spoke at lunch, she offered free digital subscriptions to all four of her magazines for a year! In exchange for the goods, the vendors want bloggers to write about their products and scanned our conference tags which gives them our email and blog information so they can follow us to see if our blogs can help their social media strategies.

Jamba Juice loves bloggers! 

Giant spoon @ Dannon yogurt booth

Complimentary massage for tired tootsies

Free manicures too!

Sandy & I go Greek trying Rickland Orchards Greek yogurt granola bar

Social media experts don’t necessarily know how to engage people!  I went to several lectures led by people on a panel speaking about branding, social engagement, and media pitching who were so boring, we walked out. Some of the content was ok but the delivery was blah and they didn’t get the attendees involved.

Bloggers like their salad!  The crowds were so large that at both breakfast  and lunch, there were no fruit, vegetables, or drinks left by the time I got to the buffet. The food– as you would expect at a conference of this size– was not great. You would think that with all the foody blogs out there someone would step up but alas, I had to settle for a tuna sandwich.

Bloggers made me laugh and cry (it was better than “Cats.”) The Voices of the Year presentation was amazing. More than 1800 bloggers submitted posts for review in various categories, then BlogHer chooses 110 winners and 15  get to read their posts out loud. There were stories about parenting, death, poverty, identity, and politics that moved me and  several hilarious humor bits that made me laugh until I cried.  The talented and absorbing writers made me want to run to my computer and get cracking. I was also inspired hearing the international activists speak. These were four women– who BlogHer sponsored to attend the conference– who risk their lives every day by blogging about their opposition to government and/or society standards in their developing countries. Hearing about how bloggers from Haiti, Sudan, Philippines, and Zimbabwe have evoked real change in women’s lives in their countries reminded me of the power of new media.

http://averagemomswearcapes.com/ blogger keeping it real

Bloggers are a random bunch!  I exchanged business cards with many strangers and I was shocked at the wide array of topics people blog about. I figured I’d meet mostly mom, food, and beauty bloggers but I also encountered these:

littlelunchnotes.com – creative, adorable lunch notes to put in your kids’ lunchbox every day, using beautiful paper, jokes, and pictures.

madeinusachallenge.com – great buying resource as it highlights products made in the USA and companies that make them.

 frugalflip.com – tips on how to live on a budget in a big city.

Bloggers are influential. Nearly 5,000 sharp, driven women (and a handful of men) got themselves to New York to be a part of this conference. Each blog can reach hundreds to millions of people. That translates to huge business opportunities for companies who want to get a product or message across to media-savvy people using a modern platform. President Obama opened the conference with a 15-minute address –via internet of course– talking about the importance of women’s issues in this election and creating positive role models for young women like his daughters. Martha Stewart was the keynote speaker Friday and Katie Couric spoke on Saturday. Those are some pretty heavy hitters. Bloggers get respect!

Overall the conference was well-organized, informative and fun. I made great contacts and learned a lot. One of the tips I took away was the importance of a blog Facebook page.  I’ll let you know as soon as it’s up so you can become a CarpoolCandy.com Facebook fan!

More Home to Work Transition Tales

An update on my transition back to work…..

If you’re looking for a quick way to deflate any ego you’ve built in adulthood, I highly recommend starting a new job. Five years ago, I was leading a team of writers and producers on breaking stories and major news events. Today I fear picking up the office phone because I won’t know how to help the caller.

The first few days were fine. I wore a dress and heels, met some nice people and got the lay of the land in the office.  Then it was time to get serious and figure out what I’m supposed to do.  I was assigned to work with various 20-somethings who clicked a mouse so fast my eyes got blurry.

I observed and took copious, disorganized notes, trying to keep up with the how-to’s. Since I’m only a freelancer I don’t have a dedicated desk.  I spent several painstaking hours on the phone with the IT department setting up my computer with logins, passwords, shortcuts, and programs, only to be kicked out of my desk by a staffer on the afternoon shift.

This job requires working on 5 separate computer programs simultaneously. Besides logging into Windows and getting Outlook mail, I need a news gathering program, content management system, online chat room with separate portals for video and writing assignments, and various websites for grabbing photos and video.

Dizzy yet?  I am.

I persevered through low moments when, feeling like a useless dunce, I wondered why I had temporarily given up my wonderful life of kid whining, dishwasher unloading, and laundry for this.

Everyone has a job to do so it’s been difficult to get someone to sit with me for more than 10 minutes to go through procedures and ask questions. I’m constantly  torn between wanting to stop and learn, and letting a colleague complete a task because I understand news has to get out quickly. For several days I felt like my coworkers were feeding me, instead of teaching me how to fish.

Note to self: proper employee training is a lost art. Everyone is in too much of a hurry.

Another problem is my innate fear of computers.  I am old enough to remember time before the internet, email, and texting. I’ve used computers since I started working in the 1990’s but they’ve never been my friends. When I hit a stumbling block in the process of creating a story for the web, I freeze. I’m anxious about what to do next and worry that I’ll delete my work or damage the system. These kids training me don’t know life without a computer so their brazen problem solving is more intuitive.

I often spend the night before work tossing and turning, cursing my mistakes and fretting that my co-workers think I’m an idiot. In the office I’m trying to work independently so I don’t have to bother busy colleagues.  I clutch my notebook and rifle through the pages, trying to remember my 8 passwords and piece together procedures.

I only work two non-consecutive days a week so it’s been difficult to find my groove. But I’m adapting. The last day I worked was the best yet. I completed a bunch of stories and worked on a slide show. My pace is woefully  s   l   o   w,  but it’s already getting easier.

I’m sure in 6 weeks I’ll  look back and laugh at what a ball of nerves and incompetence I was. Right now, it’s still raw and not yet funny.

Stay at Home to Work Transition: From Carpools to Cubicles

I started a part-time job last week as an editor at a news website. I’ve been interviewing for a while so I was lucky to find a gig in this sagging market and an opportunity to learn new skills.

While I‘ve been freelance writing from home for the last 3 years, the last time I set foot in an office, Bush 43 was president,  Michael Jackson was singing, and Bernie Madoff was still living on Park Avenue. It’s definitely been tough adapting to a corporate setting after nearly 5 years in the safe haven of my house.

All my boys (ages 6, 9, and 12) are finally in a full day of school and most weeks this summer they’re in camp so it’s the right time for me to dip my toe back into the working world and figure out what I want to do when I grow up some more.

For the last several years I’ve been a stay-at-home mom trying to keep my journalism/writing career going in my down time.  My priority was managing our family and the house so I fit in work commitments  around carpools, homework, groceries, and bedtime tuck-ins.

I’m ready to focus on work again but. …it’s an adjustment.

Ego Issues:

Challenge:  It’s always difficult to start fresh. I hate feeling inept and out of control in a new situation. I’m also taking a significant pay cut and a step down compared to my last management position.

Bonus: Less responsibility means less stress and although I’m eager to get up to speed and take on more, after several years out of the office, it’s nice to ease back in and find my way slowly.

Time Management

Challenge: Instead of coordinating schedules and tasks the night before at home, I have to look at my calendar for days, even weeks in advance to make sure I plan all the pickups, drop-offs, meals, and equipment before I leave for the office.

Bonus:  Once I get on that train, there’s nothing I can do about it so it’ll be what it will be.

Learning Curve:

Challenge: Although my news background still helps, I’ve changed fields from TV to online production and the tools are completely new. My first day I had a delightful 27-year-old training me and she clicked around so fast I felt like grandma learning to text. There must be 20 steps to getting a story online.

Bonus:   I’m learning new skills that will help me stay relevant in this ever-changing media world.  And I get to live vicariously through the life of a modern 20-something working gal in New York—and still get to go home to Wilson and my kids.

Commute:

Challenge:  I don’t hate my one-hour door-to-door commute—it’s a brief and pleasant train ride and one subway—but I resent the time suck.  It’s two hours I could be with my kids or tackling my to-do list.  Plus, the trains are unpredictable. On my first day, there were half-hour delays and some trains were diverted to another station.

Bonus:  On the train, there’s time to decompress, read, and chat with commuting friends uninterrupted.

Wardrobe:

Challenge: Need to keep up with young fashionista media types who live in Manhattan and spend half their salaries on shoes and handbags.

Bonus:  No more yoga pants and tank tops.  For two days a week I get to dress like a lady and have a legitimate excuse to shop.

I’ve already suffered through several frustrating days and there will be more to come before I feel comfortable with the technical aspects of the job and understand all my responsibilities. My coworkers seem nice and helpful and I’m jazzed by the energy of a newsroom again.

I’ll keep you posted on my progress. I anticipate at least a few mortifying stories– spilled coffee on the boss, missed deadline, accidentally publishing my to-do list on the World page, etc—in the coming months. Please share any home-to-work transitions you’ve experienced in the comments. I’d love to hear about your new employment escapades!